I Survived Post-Secondary Purgatory

I did it.

Yesterday was my last day of classes for the term at Langara. I wrapped up my English class, my Biology class and my Psychology class. Most of which are courses I’m not super interested in, but have to do as pre-reqs anyway. I don’t mind the psych class, I just wish it was a little more focused on neurosciences instead of so general. But I understand completely that first year courses are general for a reason, and I don’t mind that.

But I have exited purgatory and now I can start focusing on classes that will actually hold my attention and I will want to study more in depth. This fall I’ll be taking Exercise Physiology (with a focus on cardiac rehabilitation), Bryan Dysfunction and Recovery, Brain and Behaviour (an intro to neuroscience class), Research Methods in Kinesiology, Human Motor Behaviour, BioMechanics, and Skeletal Muscle Physiology. I’m really excited. I was also accepted into a 16 month program (seminar style class thingie) where I will learn about chronic health conditions in a mutli-professional setting. I’ll be presenting my learnings at a symposium in April, and writing a paper for next December. It’s pretty cool!

And Italy is soooooon! (Which also means I’m almost done work and so excited for that) In 15 days I jet off across the pond for a month-long adventure. I’ll be landing in Paris, then flying to Nice (3 days), Cinque Terre (3 days), Florence (3 days), Rome (3 days), Naples (2 days), Sorrento (1 day), Venice (1 day), Milan (3 days) and then back to Paris (3 days) before returning home.

I’ve also been back training BJJ full-time. I found a great gym that I really like, and I’ll be helping out by teaching the women’s class in the fall when I’m back. Which I’m excited and nervous about. I’m finally getting to a point now where I feel like I don’t have to think about what I’m doing when I roll, I can just go with the flow so to speak and not worry about thinking “Am I gonna break my ankle if I roll this direction?” The muscle memory is coming back, I’m remembering how to properly pass, properly submit, properly play guard. Although I’m playing more open guard (and not liking it) since it’s hard to play closed guard with my knee. I’m re-adapting my game to work for my physical limitations, and I think I’m going to end up playing top more often than bottom now. A complete 180 of my game. I like it.

And I fell in love. With a judoka. We met at an open mat for BJJ, went on a date a week later, and the rest is history. Things have been going really well, and I like that I have someone in my life that understands my view on training and won’t complain when I go to the gym (more often than not, he’ll be at the gym too). And it’s nice to have him as a training partner too. And he just gets me. There’s no fear of being judged with him. It’s amazing.

So yeah! Great summer!

I’ll be posting lots of photos of my trip to Italy and France on Instagram under the hashtags #scxNice #scxCinqueTerre #scxFlorence #scxFirenze #scxRome #scxRoma #scxNaples #scxNapoli #scxVenice #scxVenezia #scxMilan #scxMilano #scxEurope

My insta is set to private though (because someone who I don’t want following me, found me), so if you’d like, just send a request to follow.

May Update

Well, May has been pretty busy.

I started back at Langara to finish up my first year science stuff. I can’t say I’m totally in love with the material, having gotten a taste of how nice specific courses are. But I figure if I can power my way through first year bio, psychology and English, I’m golden. I’m also studying my ass off for my Chem final, which falls on my birthday. Another reason for me to drink a lot that night, heh.

I’m also working more the research project I mentioned last post. I’m learning a programming language for MatLab, and reading up on some BioMechanics stuff. It’s really neat. Baby steps!

And I’ve been going to a lot of… classes. For martial arts. I’ve been going to open mats on the weeknds for BJJ, which is awesome! I got a new gi in the mail this week and it fits me like a dream. I love it so much. I also did some boxing at my college, which was cool. I need to figure out how to fit it into my open mat schedule. And I did an MMA class last Sunday, which was also really fun. It was strange to have to worry about punching while grappling, and it totally threw me into the mindset I had when I first started BJJ.

Things are going really well. I’m happy.

And I’m planning my trip to Italy still. I have all the places I’m gonna stay, and the traveling within Europe figured out. Now I just have to decide what I’m going to do at each city. Much excitement!


It’s been a while

It’s been a few months hasn’t it?

I’ve been enjoying living in my new home, enjoying my awesome new roommates, enjoying living with my pup, enjoying my awesome classes and being close to school. And enjoying life in general.

A far cry from my implosion a few months ago.

I’ve wrapped up classes, and am studying for finals this week. And studying for my Chem final at some point in July.

Things in the dating scene are looking up as well. I’ve dated a few new men, and am completely over The American. We’re still friends, but I am no longer infatuated and it’s the most liberating thing ever. I was seeing a man, The Paramedic, for a little bit. But it was very on and off. I’m not sure what his deal was, but I’ve decided it will be off, and shall remain so. I’m not interested in being toyed with. I’ve also gone on a few other dates, none came to fruition though.

However, I’ve been seeing someone new for about 3 weeks now and I really like him. On paper he’s next to perfect, and in person he’s amazing. On our second date, we went to a caberat and danced to 50’s music all night. It was pretty spectacular. He’s pretty spectacular. And I hope that by writing about this I don’t jinx myself (not that I really believe in that kind of stuff, but… y’know…)

I’ve been to a few open mats for BJJ, but nothing serious. I haven’t really trained since I hurt my knee in May, and even though the MRI came back saying that nothing was wrong with my knee, it still aches and is uncomfortable in certain positions. I’m hesitant to do anything crazy with it.


I will be finishing up some courses at my old college this summer. I figured I would contact an old professor I had there and talk about research opportunities with him. And it sounds like we’re going to START one… from scratch! Isn’t that exciting! Probably in the biomechanics of posture and balance field, which is something I’ve been interested in. It’ll be awesome to delve deeper into that and learn about research methods and what not. So much excite!

Anyway, I should get back to studying psychology.

Hi ho silver, away!


Things That Made 2014 Amazing

I realize it’s like.. the end of January already. But I had been working on this post since like… May. And then I went ahead and forgot to post it. But dammit all I’m gonna post it anyway.

Here is a list of things that made 2014 (even though it was a super shitty year) great.


Got to be single – This is maybe the most significant transformation for me. Being single allowed me to grow and evolve as a person and experience life in a totally new light. I embraced my independence and freedom. Here’s a picture of me with the only boy I’ll ever need :P


Finished 1st year Kin on Dean’s List. Which was amazing. I enjoyed almost all my classes and I feel like I learned a lot. I really laid out a good foundation for the rest of my bachelors degree.

This is just before taking a Bio Final.


And this is me studying for an Anatomy Final.


I went to the Dominican Republic for a family trip and studied for Physiology there.


I rode a pirate ship! This was a lot of fun.


I shot a gun! (It was terrifying and kind of neat) It was a friend’s birthday, and she really wanted to shoot paper.


Got into UBC Vancouver! A feat in and of itself I believe. There were 120 spots and I got in. And now! I can finish my bachelors and not be stuck after two years at a college.


My lovely friends at Jiu Jitsu gave me a mini celebration for my birthday when I was feeling down about being 25.

And then my other friend took me out for beer!


I rediscovered how frickin’ awesome Vancouver is.


I went to Busker Fest and saw a ton of amazing people do amazing things.


Started fall term at UBC with most of the classes I wanted


Went to France – Two awful things happened and it was still the best two weeks of my life.


Worked during the summer.  Which is good because after becoming single I had a shit load of legal bills and what not to deal with before finally being free.


I also landed a gig back at one of my favourite studios to work part time while studying



I got to watch the Canada Day Fireworks!


Met The American, and made frequent trips over the border. :)


He even came up to watch the Celebration of Light! (And that was an amazing weekend)


Nearly OD’d on homemade cold brew coffee every morning of the summer. Worth it.


I bought myself a brand new bike! I named it Grover.


Before I quit BJJ, I got a stripe on my blue belt!


Went to Portland…twice! – Another perk of being single is I get to go where I want, when I want essentially. So I finally made the trek down to Portland to see my buddy Lo!

And watched my first football game


I painted something pretty! And attempted to paint more after this.



Officially changed my name.


Hurt my knee but got it fixed! Well, sorta. I rehabbed it myself (and it’s doing well so far), and I have an MRI apt in Feb.


I mentioned last post and the one before that I’m moving. And I kind of wanted to write about that and get my thoughts out on pixels.

I am so… damn… excited for this move. I went last week to give my roommates my damage deposit, pet deposit, pick up my sets of keys and figure out what day I’m moving in. I was really happy to get the chance to chat with them a bit more, and actually meet one of them. The more I talk to them, the better I feel about this change. I text back and forth with one, and she’s such a sweet heart.

I’m looking forward to not feeling so anxious all the time (although the antidepressants are supposed to help with that as well). To being around people, being able to speak to people… But I think the thing I’m looking forward to most is Monty being able to live with me. I have to wait a little bit for my roommate to get back so that we can introduce Monty to her cat in the least stressful way for the cat. And I’m really hoping that goes well. My only concern is that he’ll bark and spook the cat, but other than that, Monty likes cats. All fingers and limbs crossed. I just want to be able to snuggle my pup at night, and listen to him sing me little welcome home songs. It sounds silly, but Monty is my little canine soul mate.

Plus, it’ll be nice to have a larger home with a living room, be close to school, across the street from a grocery store, be near coffee shops and restaurants, and libraries. I won’t be so socially and geographically isolated. And I’ll be able to ride my bike everywhere too! The only downside is it’s an hour and a half by bus from my parents place.

And so… I’m moving on Dec 16th. I was going to wait until Jan 1st when my current lease is up, but… fuck it. Nothing is open Jan 1st anyway, no one wants to move on Jan 1st… And I don’t want to have to set my life up in the course of a weekend before school starts. So I’m eating the few hundred bucks to save myself more insanity.

I’m excited. There’s a light at the end of the tunnel.

It should be a quick move. Most of my stuff is still in boxes and the only furniture I have is bedroom stuff, and that is all still in boxes (hasn’t even been put together yet!). My whole life fits into a moving van. It’s not a bad way to go about things.

Wrapping It Up

Well, tomorrow is my last day of school.

It’s been… hard. I’m not going to lie. I still have finals to prepare for. Math is down the shitter so I’m focusing on Chem and Kin right now. With what little mental capacity I have after all this burn out.

I’m looking forward to having most of December off so I can just… reset. And settle into my new home (I’m moving soonish!)

Happy thanksgiving to all my American friends! (tomorrow)

More Change

2014, the year of Change! You son of a bitch.

I saw my doctor this week. She put me on sleeping pills. I have another appointment this week to see if I need antidepressants (I’m trying to avoid this). I also had an appointment with my psychologist, and unpacked a bunch of issues for an hour. It felt good afterwards. And I’m living at my parents place, and I have a week or two off from school.

And I quit my job and I’m moving…. again.

I feel like this year has had a lot of repeats. This will be the…. 3rd or 4th place I’ve lived in the past 7 months.

I have a really good feeing about it. I’m not just settling for this place like I did my current home.

I saw the ad on craigslist, and fell in love with the photos because they reminded me of the place I stayed in France. And the description was lengthy! There was information about each room mate, the home, the location, and the home philosophy. It just felt good. So I emailed them an equally lengthy email, went over yesterday to check it out and spent at least a solid hour conversing with my soon to be flatmate. And it was like talking to a mirror. We’ve both gone through some really similar things in the past little while and we both want the same things in a home, but she was much better at articulating it. As I was leaving, she straight up offered me the space. So I’m going to take it. And my mother, who went with me, thinks I should take it too. And now I have to find furniture because I don’t have a bed of my own.

It feels like a “forever home”. Maybe it won’t be, but it won’t feel like I’m temporary, which is how I feel in my home now. I’m going to see if I can move on the 1st of Dec, but if I can’t, Jan 1st works just as well. It really comes down to my landlord. I could move my entire home in about 2 hours, because I literally have… nothing. I have kitchen shit and clothes. Speedy.

And my job… I went in on Friday and spoke to my producer and told him basically everything that’s gone on, where I was at mentally and that I couldn’t keep working. He was more sympathetic that I was expecting and told me that if I ever needed a gig again when I was out of school or could handle it, I had one. So that made me feel really good.

I’m still slightly stressed out about not working. I thrive (or die?) from the feeling of being productive, the feeling of working. So I’m channelling that into my school work. I’m hoping I can salvage my grades after last week. I’ve given up hope of Calculus, but I’m still going full steam ahead on Chemistry.

So yes.

All the change.

Good change.