Ways To Better Myself

One of my favourite youtubers Meghan Tonjes (1st and 2nd channels) did a #30DayToDoList video for the month of September and I figured I’d do it for the month of October. Since… may as well, right? I made a list of 25 things for the month of October that I want to work on, achieve, or be mindful of.

I’m always trying to better myself, and I guess that comes with small steps.

  1. Bike to work/school more often. Even in the rain.
  2. Keep bedroom clean.
  3. Do homework at the library/cafe and NOT at home. I find I’m more productive in public than at home.
  4. Write lists. Positivity lists, to do lists, formula lists… Liiiists
  5. Stretch daily.
  6. Make healthy lunches for the week on Sunday.
  7. Eat breakfast at home and not on the go.
  8. Incorporate more art into your life. Painting, photography, caligraphy, etc… Viewing art, and going to art related events. Create and be inspired.
  9. Drink more green tea, and less coffee.
  10. Prepare veggie snacks for school. Healthy snacks are important when I’m cruising around school. Plus, they save me money.
  11. Read for pleasure. I have a few books I need to finish up, one of them being “Doomed”.
  12. Swim at uni. Take advantage of the fact that you get to use the pool for FREE!
  13. Keep with #Project20 (getting there!)
  14. Take vitamins.
  15. Floss daily.
  16. Practice calculus more often. Like… daily.
  17. Don’t spend money carelessly. I’m pretty good with my money anyway, but everyone could always be better.
  18. No computer, phone, social media 30 mins before bed. I plan to use this time for a proper bedtime routine.
  19. HAVE a proper bedtime routine. Rinse off in the shower, wash face, brush/floss teeth. The whole she-bang. In addition, perhaps just a good skin care routine. I’m not going to be 25 forever.
  20. Bake! Not every day, but y’know… Hone the skill. It’s something I enjoy, and I want to be better at it.
  21. Recognize who or what is worth my time and who or what isn’t.
  22. Don’t lose sight of long term goals just because the short term is difficult. Do not despair.
  23. Don’t get trapped in the pit of apathy. Especially with school.
  24. Take advantage of opportunities, no matter how small they are.
  25. Say “yes” to more things, especially things (harmless things) that you’d normally say “no” to.

So what are somethings YOU want to improve on for the month of October? It can be 1 thing, 5 things, 10 things…. 30 things?  Let me know.

A Few Weeks Down


So I’m somehow still alive.

Remember how a little while ago I posted about Flirting with Burnout? HAH! Well! Burnout and I have a very serious intimate relationship now, in which I am cheating on Sleep.

Typical college student.

Work has been straight forward and not stressful at all. I’ve been meeting all my deadlines ahead of time and my boss seems very happy with my work. But it is eating up 24 hours a week (plus commute time) of valuable homework time and I find that when I come home after a day at work or school or both (Wed and Fri are my “Double Duty” days) I just don’t have the mental capacity to do calculus or chemistry practice, or the motivation to read about motor development in children. All I want to do is come home, shower, and surf reddit. I don’t even want to read the rest of my Chuck Palahniuk book “Doomed”, which is hilarious as fuck by the way.

So I’ve elected to spend my Saturdays and Sundays at the Learning Centre on campus in an attempt to catch up with things and being my prep for midterms, which start for me on Sept 30th. The good thing about this is that the school rec centre is right across the street, so when I’m done studying I can go swimming or go lift weights. At least make an effort to lean out and keep on keepin’ on with #Project20.

The good news, is that I have 2 weeks off from work after next Friday. Most of which will be spent studying for midterms, but I do have another Portland trip planned for Oct 3rd to Oct 6th. I’ll be going it alone and spending the weekend with my lovely friend Lorelei (has seen in previous instagram photos). I’m desperately looking forward to this. I will have to study for a chemistry exam while I’m there, but it won’t be too bad.

It’s not even the end of the first month and I’m exhausted. What the hell.

The Last Hurrah

I was really determined to have a “Last Hurrah” before school started this fall. I’ve never really done this before, it’s usually just been working right up until the day before school, or taking a week off and chilling out at home until school starts.

But this year is different in so many ways. I asked The American if he wanted to go on an adventure with me, he agreed and we trekked down to Portland to visit my friends and his friends.

Friday – I bused to The American’s city early morning and spent the day with him. We baked Nutella/peanut butter treats for the football game (I know nothing about football at all) on Saturday. We had dinner at a local restaurant, discussed Game of Thrones, and what music we were going to listen to on our way to Portland.

Saturday – I woke up to The American making mini French toasts. We showered, he packed and then we began our mini road trip to Portland. When we got to Portland, we made a quick stop for beer and whiskey.  We got there early but at 7:30pm more people showed up and we watched the Oregon Ducks play football, I had so many questions. I know basically nothing about football, just that one team runs to the end and the other team tries to stop them. Well, I know more about the rules now! After the 2nd period, it was pretty obvious that the Ducks were going to win, so we went to a kareoke bar and had a grand ol’ time.

Sunday – We went for (a massive) brunch with our hosts, checked out an antique shop, went downtown to Powells and bought books! Met up with a bunch of people, including the American’s childhood friend and his wife, at a beer place, drank beer, went to have sushi after a few hours, and then went back to our hosts place and watched The Antichrist and then Dogma.

Monday – Our plan was to meet with The American’s friend for brunch before heading back, but something came up for them, so we picked up a quick meal at a grocery store, bought some coffee at Heart and then headed north. We tried to go shopping really quick, but the labour day crowds were insane. We took the scenic route back to his town, and then made a stop for roof top patio pizza and wine. When we were stuffed, we headed back to his place, watched the first half of The Hobbit and then went to catch my bus. Problem was that I never booked a ticket because I didn’t know what Monday’s plan was going to be, and the bus was sold out. So my plan was to buy a ticket if there was a seat available (sometimes there is). The bus was more than 45 mins late, so The American decided to just drive me home. I felt bad because it was another hour in the car for him, but it was a really sweet gesture, and he said he didn’t mind.

All in all, it was a fantastic weekend and I really enjoyed myself. I’m really glad I finally got to have a weekend of fun with great people.


They Lied About School

You know how the first day of university is supposed to be all new and shiny? How it’s your first time away from your parents and the laundry machine still has its novelty? The freedom of being able to eat what you want, stay out as long as you want.

I don’t get it.

I’m sure being 25 has something to do with it. But even my first few days on campus have been a farce.

Tuesday was the first day of school, but there were no classes, so I opted to work 3 hours while I should have been touring around the campus with a transfer student group. Learning about ways to succeed. I did show up eventually, for a pep rally. Which is code for school spirit/propoganda and several cheesy speeches about how we are diverse students, and we can be anything we want to be, and how we can be the sparkling individual academic stars that make up the sky that is UNIVERSITY. I was going to go check out clubs afterwards, but the rain was coming down hard and I was sans umbrella and jacket.

Yesterday, I had a math workshop I thought I had to attend since no professors or person of authority had sent out an email or any kind of notification telling the students that workshops do not, in fact, start until the second week. So I was up at 6am, commuted an hour, to sit in a classroom with 10 other students for 15 mins until otherwise notified. I ended up going to work early.

And as I write this, at 6:40am, it’s THURSDAY when I have my first actual day of classes, and the excitement has worn off. I will do my best to hold on to any shimmer of enthusiasm enthusiasm for the next 15 weeks. But I have a feeling that’s going to be a challenge at 5:45am every day of the week.

Or maybe I’m just in need of a giant mug of caffeine.

Flirting with Burnout

This will be my first term of school where I am supporting myself.

I will be in school for 13.5 hours a week, doing 27 hours of homework a week, and working 24 hours a week. Not to mention trying to find time to go to the gym and see my friends.

My #Project20 has not gone as well as I’d like, even though I’m eating well and biking every day. I need to lift weights. That starts next week when I get my membership to the gym at university.

All of that for 13 weeks, and then two weeks of studying for finals and working 32-40 hours a week in December.

My parents worry that I’m going to burn out.

I worry I’ll burn out.

But I really need to prove to myself that I can do this. I can get on the Honour Roll and support myself. I can still hold on to my dignity, health and independence.


Learning What Single People Do

I’m in month four of being a singleton. This is by far the longest I’ve ever been single. I’m not sure how I feel about it. It’s great, but it’s weird.

I came home today after work, around 6:30. I showered, because I was sweaty from riding uphill for 40 blocks. I ate a banana and some peanut butter, and then a bit more peanut butter, and then cursed at myself for consuming the extra pb because I’m trying to lose weight. Basically, I realized that most nights of being single are just as boring as they were when I was with the Ex. And I’m not sure if this is a reflection on the illness of the relationship, or my inability to get out there and do shit on a weeknight as a singleton. What do people who work a 9-5 job do when they get home? I don’t have TV, the internet only entertains me so much, and because I forgot my glasses at work I can’t read (this font is currently massive so I CAN read it).

I kind of want school to start already so I can at least keep busy “after hours”. Or expand my social network to more than a 10 min conversation with my landlord about UFC. Or finally get a membership to the on campus gym where I can get back to my 5×5 lifting (I feel disgusting you guys. I feel soft, and even though I’m biking 10km a day and eating well, I feel like I’m putting on fat or losing muscle.)

But I also just want the long weekend to happen so I can go off and have fun and not think about school or work for 4 solid days.

Do single people just try to date all the time? I don’t feel like I have the energy for that. To do the “what are your hopes and dreams” conversation more than once a week sounds…. exhausting. And I’m too much of an efficiency freak to want to put more effort in than is neccessary once I realize that I don’t want to take things further with the person. Like when I went on the 30 min date with Senor Pantalones Verde (Mr Green Pants) but that is a story for another post. Which I should write, because it’s kind of funny. Anyway, I should have left the moment I shook hands with the guy, but I didn’t. I wasted another 29 mins before finally pulling the plug.

Anyway… random thoughts for the night, since I have fuck all else to do. (I did tabata yesterday, I’m mildly stiff today, I will be very stiff tomorrow. I forgot how much working out sucks when you’re out of shape. I’m hoping the biking worked out some of the ‘ick’.)

Summer Update

Summer is quickly coming to a close, and while I’m kind of sad that I’ll have to pack away my shorts and tank tops, I’m looking forward to the new beginnings associated with September. (And laying my clothing and pumpkin/cinnamon everything)

I managed to move off the wait lists of doom and am now enrolled in a Kinesiology class, a math class and a chemistry class. Only three, but I think it’s a good amount of course work for a transition term. I didn’t need to take 5 classes per term anyway, so it works out perfectly. I’m waiting to see if I’ll get knocked off the wait lists for math and chemistry for the January term. Fingers crossed.

Life in the dating scene… is… well, y’know. Boring? I shouldn’t say boring. The local scene is boring. Men are stand off-ish, and online dating is strange to me. I’m still seeing The American. He is lovely. I get to see him once or twice a month usually, but we talk daily. It’s one of those we-shall-see-where-it-goes kind of things. I’m guarded, but I’m excited about him. Does that make sense? No? Okay, nevermind.

Work has been a roller coaster of Bullshit, capital B. You can read about the company I work(ed?) for HERE and HERE. The Vancouver studio didn’t get paid like we were supposed to on Aug 7th, we all walked out that Friday, didn’t come in Monday. Got a new contract from the new company that had bought the old one… got our paycheques on the Tues. The whole transition process is a cluster fuck and no one seems to know what’s going on.

Basically I have another week left of this nightmare and then I get to go back to school, AND I start work at another studio, one who isn’t going bankrupt and will actually pay its employees on time. The downside? They took away the coffee machine the other day! Lucky for me, Gastown has a plethora of cafes to choose from.

I’m also officially off the mortgage. Huzzah! And now I can finally apply for a visa and a student line of credit.

This has been a twisty, turny, bendy, jumbly, fucked up, upside down summer. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had a blast for the most part. But there’s always been that work/school admin stuff to deal with. But life is good, I am good. And I’m happy.

I’m super excited to see what September has to offer me.